“Do not throw away your confidence.” Hebrews 10:35
If in this moment, the most authentic and confident version of yourself showed up to check in, what would she say to you? Imagine what she would sound like, look like, and how she would make you feel. You love her already don’t you? Good. You should. That’s who you really are.
Definition of Confidence:
- The feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust.
- The state of feeling certain about the truth of something.
- Self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.
A confident woman puts others at ease because she first trusts God and believes in herself. For the longest time, I longed to be that kind of woman but paled in comparison to the pedestal I had her on. Movies would replay in my mind of how the confident version of myself would enter a room, make others feel seen, say the right thing, refrain from saying the wrong thing, and add value to whoever I was around. But, if you only knew how many more times the movies would replay in my mind after I left any social gathering, “Why did you say that? You really could have said what you were trying to say ten other ways! Honestly Haley, you did that again? They don’t want you around, can’t you see? When are you going to show up to a social setting prepared? Next time, stay home.”
Ripping. Myself. To. Shreds.
In the heat of the moment, I never saw that my post-constructive (more like, self-sabotage) evaluation was in fact destroying any ounce of confidence I did have and painting myself as unlovable and unworthy. Imagine it like this, you’re in a deep pit and you’ve climbed halfway to the top. Then suddenly, you start reevaluating how you got halfway and decide it wasn’t good enough, so you convince yourself to drop to the bottom only to try again and hopefully not disappoint yourself and the invisible spectators. Climb. Drop. Repeat. Can you relate?
Truthfully, I hope you can’t, but if you do, there is a prayer for you. Psalms 71:14 says, “But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.” In this passage, the psalmist David is in great distress because his enemies wouldn’t relent from coming after him. After 13 verses of telling God what was happening and declaring Truth over the situation, there is a pivot to him then declaring Truth over himself and how he will move forward. For something to be declared, it not only has to be powerful, but more importantly it has to be believed in. Even though David’s situation was dire and seemed hopeless without an end in sight, he decides his firm position on the matter. Just like you and me, David was human, not a superhero; he felt pain, disappointment, and failure, and socially, he was rejected- even after he was anointed King. What was he putting his hope in?
“We must silence the movies in our heads that tear down the version God sees, deeply loves, constantly pursues, and fiercely protects.”
How different would Psalm 71 read if after he scribbled down the details of the happenings, he proceeded to tear himself apart. “David, throw in the towel. No one is going to follow you once you’re King. If you let them catch you now, you won’t have to live on the run anymore. If God really wanted you King, He wouldn’t’ve let these men come after you.” David went before us in the area of confidence, so we can learn from his example- he had trust in his God and believed in himself. This stance positioned him for victory.
Where does that leave you and me? We must silence the movies in our heads that tear down the version God sees, deeply loves, constantly pursues, and fiercely protects. To get out of the pit you have to stop trying to do it on your own. With all the courage you have, place one of your tired hands into the capable hands of Jesus. Once you do, you’ll notice how much stronger your climb, sure your footing is, and confident you are in yourself.
Your confidence is calling, friend. She speaks to you boldly and lovingly from the Truth- God’s living and active Word, that’s been hidden in her heart, “You are God’s masterpiece. (Eph. 2:10) His grace is sufficient for you. (2 Cor 12:9) You are a child of God. (Gal 3:26)
Taking a stance based on the Truth of who God says you are positions you for victory in any circumstance, season, and relationship. Because of Jesus, you can hold onto your confidence, and never throw it away.
Love & Prayers,
Haley
